Saturday 21 July 2007

5 pieces of plastic

I havent updated in a while..my excuse is that I am too busy doing some minor little jobs on the cars, and busy fitting a carpc, which in itself is a time consuming affair.

One of the minor jobs that needed doing, which I absultely have to fix is a small repair on the electric front window. This needs adjusting, which means I have to remove the door cards to get to the little motor adjustments.

And, being a BMW, you absolutely WILL break and/or lose some of the little door card clips, so as any good DIYer would do, you order some in advance so that when it is time to do the job, all required parts are available.

Unbeknown to me, this decision would prove to be one I would rather forget.

I went to our local ECP (Euro Carparts) and ordered the plastic bits, 5 of (keep some spare) for a total or about 11p each if I remember correctly.. Yes, I spent almost a £1 with them on these items, but while I was there I picked up a headlight for the wife's wagon and some other bits and bobs, as you do
Their website showed the part in stock, and the local branch's computer system showed the parts in stock, so I paid. But when it came time to physically get the parts, oh no...an empty parts bin...they were gone.
Having worked in stock control systems before, I know how easy it is to lose or mislay small low value items, so I had a bit of a laugh.

ECP said it would be there on monday morning (this was a saturday), but I can only get to them on wednesday or a friday...so I said I will pop in on wednesday. Wednesday I was unavailable, so I ended up going to them on friday. Oh no (second time)..looks like the parts have arrived, but someone has nicked them (apparently a lot of ECP staff drive E36 bmw's and they have a craving for door clips). The guy serving me, however, handily noted the headlight etc on my order was in stock and started picking them and giving them to me, and I, like a true born honest person, reminded him I am happy with the headlight I had already got on that order, and he can keep the second headlight he was about to give to me, free of charge, as per incompetent rule #1

No problem, says the smiling ECP staff member, referring to my non-existent door clips, he will order some more and put them in his draw, and keep them for me.

So, the next Saturday I go back...Oh no (3rd time)...the parts are missing again. Did mr ECP put them in his draw? like fuck he did. No problem, he will order some more (by this time I am thinking to sell any shares in ECP and put them into chinese plastic factories) and put them in his draw (again) and...and..he is going to LOCK his draw (ooooohhhhh....)

and so we come to this morning's caper.
pitch up at ECP, stand in the queue, and see their coca-cola machine. £1 for 500ml, but it is hot so I put my pound into the machine, and select my beverage of choice. SOLD OUT flashes on the display...so I pick my second one..SOLD OUT...and my third..SOLD OUT.
In fact, every drink was sold out, and the ECP environmetalists keep the machine plugged in..because...because....?? fuck knows.
I ask the machine give me back my pound, but computer says no.

So now I am in the queue and hot and pissed off to boot.
And the smiling ECP man says to me..OH NO (door clips) not here...shakes his head...says he will order them in and have them by Monday. I wonder, is that ECP codespeak for "MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, watch me wind up this knob guys!"

I pointed at my address on the invoice, and told him that is where he will deliver the parts on Wednesday. He told me no. I reminded him that that is where he will deliver the parts on wednesday. He told me no, again. I left.

EXECUTIVE SUMMARY:
I will no longer buy anything from ECP in woodford avenue, Ilford. You guys suck mounds of donkey shit, and then ask your customers to lick said donkey shit out of your butt-cracks. I have been waiting almost 2 months for 5 pieces of plastic and you cannot even get that right, even though I have been to see you (in total) around 6 times to collect these pieces of plastic. Your computer systems are paraffin driven and your staff (that I have come into contact with) could care less for the well-being of your customers.

And your coca-cola machine's password is 4231, but no worry, it is devoid of any liquids.